lonely.

So I'm in one of those moods where I don't know if it's PMS or loneliness or I'm just completely exhausted. I fell asleep around 8pm last night and woke up at 415am for work, still in a weird mood. I really don't know how to shake the funk, and I have to be on my best behavior the next few days because I have 2 more early mornings at work. It's hard to bounce between jobs and not have a moment to decompress, but a girl has to pay the bills.

It's times like this where I think it would be so much easier to deal with everything if I had someone to stand beside me in the tough times. Like if I had someone's hand to hold at the end of the day all my problems would magically melt away. I've done that before, and I know it's not totally true, but it would be nice to have someone's should to cry on when I'm too exhausted to move.

And then I feel guilty for having these feelings because I'm an independent gal, I work 2 jobs, I pay my own bills, I walk myself home late at night from the bar... why do I need someone? I think it's now more of a selfish 'want' than a real 'need.' I don't know if I've ever really NEEDED anyone to validate myself.

So all you happy [or even unhappy] couples out there, I'm a little jealous of your bed companion. And your weeknight movie companion. And your kissing in the rain companion. Sappy enough yet?



I've also been completely obsessed with this song. It's the sweetest and saddest song about a one night stand that I've ever heard. I love Hello Saferide because she's completely silly and honest at the same time. It's definitely one of those albums where I feel like 99% of the songs were written personally for me. And I wish I could blast them from my balcony so everyone could finally understand me and why I'm so sad sometimes.

Please bear with my emoness for a bit. I promise it will pass. I guarantee it!

xx