hopefully.

I got a phone call tonight from the chef at a new restaurant that's opening across the street from my place. Thanks to the lovely networking of my friends in this neighborhood, they got my resume and it's being passed along to the Pastry Chef. I'm hoping this brings an interview and job offer along because I'm really over the bakery I'm at currently. I've been there almost a year, and I've pretty much reached the highest position I can be in... which is funny because it's the same position I started in.

Today I stayed home from work because I woke up to my head pounding. I'm sure it's all the stress I'm putting myself under, feeling exhausted, and just not taking proper care of myself. The lazy day was needed, but I'm still feeling a bit "bleh" inside. Maybe it has something to do with my picking fights with the bear the last few days. There's no reason for them, I'm just feeling selfish and needy.

In all honesty, all I want right now is a big cup of frozen yogurt, a good documentary [or possible some Pawn Stars], and him. Instead, I'm in bed alone, playing Word Feud on my phone, and writing here.

I don't like acting like a crazy female, because I know that's how I'm acting. Hormones just suck and I can't do anything about that.

I'm lucky, I have a great guy that still cares about me no matter how silly I'm acting. But I shouldn't have to put him through that. I shouldn't act like a bitch towards my friends when they just want to hang out with me and I'm being surly. I really need to either be alone for awhile, or suck it up and get over myself.

Things are gonna get better. I have to believe that. This phone call tonight proves that, because I really never expected any response. I'm so ready for that next step in my life. I'm ready to get over my insecurities and just accept for once that people really do love and care about me when they say they do.

Maybe I should start doing yoga again. Or actually ride my bike somewhere. Getting out and doing something might be a bit more helpful for me these days. Or maybe I just need a beer and to get more sleep.

Meh.