new.

happy new year.

it's been quite awhile since i wrote on here. but i can't sleep right now. i've been having a really odd week, and the bear has been so nice and patient with me. it's so nice that we've been together for over 4 months now, but goodness does it feel a lot longer. we had a great holiday season, and got to spend time with both our families. but the reality of going back to work and back to real life has made me cranky and even a bit depressed.

i want to have a normal schedule. i'm applying for jobs in the administrative field. plus the bakery i'm still working out is stressing me out beyond belief. it's hard to work 60 hours a week, have a relationship, have friendships, make time to take care of my responsibilities, as well as making time to relax and decompress. i'm wound pretty tight, and it really takes a toll on the work i produce and my personal life. so trying to find that balance again has been difficult, but i'm sure i'll get there. i don't have a full day off until the 17th, so that'll have me working about 15 days without a break. so lame.

i just have to believe that all this hard work will pay off in the end. that there really is a light at the end of the tunnel. and that one day [hopefully soon] i'll have a job that works with my life and vice versa.

until then i'm gonna try to release some stress, get some sleep, and hopefully get back to "normal".

xx